Invitation Etiquette...

A few weeks ago we were invited to a meal at someone's home. The hostess said, "I'm glad you can come, I was thinking of inviting the X family. Do you know them? I thought you'd like them."

Well, as it turns out, we do know them and we're not the biggest fans, but what was I supposed to say?

"Yes, I do know them, but we don't get along with them (or would prefer if you found another family."

What I find happens when you know that another couple is coming and you know you're not the biggest fans of them, it affects the way you go into the experience. Human nature being what it is, some people begin to dread it. I tend to stay positive and figure I'll make the best of it, but I do have to work hard at it.

Which is why I usually don't tell people who are coming to our home who else is coming with them (unless I know for certain that they already like each other.)

We are, of course, not trying to put people together who don't get along knowingly.

In fact, we have had one instance where a woman asked "who else is coming?" and I could see in her face when I responded that it wasn't a match. With no surprise, the family "declined" that invite and rescheduled with us.

Annoying for me, since we obviously are planners and lay things out well in advance and a reason why I don't ask for others' opinions.

Better to have people excited about coming to your home for as long as possible and then, if you arrive and someone of whom you aren't particularly fond of is there, you deal. The runway to the event is as important as the event itself and I want our friends excited about coming to us for as long as possible.