Thursday, November 22, 2001

On Bringing “Something” to a Meal as an Invited Guest

Thank you for thinking so highly of our family as to invite us to a meal. We are honored to accept your invitation and look forward to sharing time with you.

It is important that you understand the following matter.

My wife, Tamar, feels VERY STRONGLY about bringing “something” to a meal to which she is invited. This must also be something substantial (i.e. flowers and wine are not acceptable “somethings.”) She feels so strongly about this that if you choose to tell her “nothing,” she will elect to not attend. You will protest. She will insist. This will continue. Eventually, you will see that she will not budge and you will agree to let her bring “something substantial.”

There are documented occasions where her resolve has been tested and I have gone to a meal alone because the host would not comply with her request. (Personally, I don’t care and will happily bring “nothing.”)

I have spent countless hours serving as the go-between in negotiations and discussions that were pointless, as I knew the outcome before they began. Thus, I am asking you to simply reply with a request for what she can bring and save all of us the time that would otherwise be involved in this back and forth.

Once again, thank you for your warm invite (are you still glad you made it?). We look forward to seeing you.

P.S. Please note that the following allergies apply.

Updated (1/11/08): Like you, we look for validation of our "worldview" so it was refreshing to hear from Sharon Kushnir this week when she said:
"I love this policy. It takes one thing off my to-do list and it's a big