Feelings on a Bike Ride...

You know that scene at the beginning of "Raiders of the Lost Ark" where Indiana Jones is running to avoid being crushed by that huge boulder?

Every great drama has a similar scene.

If life is a drama, then I had one of those scenes this morning.

I had to go in for some thyroid-related follow-on blood work and the lab is about 1 mile from my house.

After dropping Tungsten off at school, I got on the bike, figuring...it's summer, I am working from home, and the exercise never hurt. By the time I was about 3 blocks from the lab, it was obvious...there's going to be a MASSIVE storm coming through. It's just a question of when.

In an unusual experience for the medical profession, I went in, signed one form, had the blood taken and was back out the door in under about 9, no 7, no 9 minutes.

I got on the bike and scanned the skies.

I had a chance.

I pedaled my heart out, feeling the wind picking up, seeing leaves swirl about on the ground, watching the sky become more and more ominously grey.

On the way, I went by the playground next to Tungsten's school/camp. Today is Carnival Day and the kids were lined up waiting for their turn on the moonbounce.

I am reading a book now at the suggestion of Rachel Milner called Difficult Conversations. The basic premise is how to have conversations with others where you can honestly talk about your feelings so that they are not a hidden obstacle to conflict resolution. It's been an eye-opener for me, particularly the part that differentiates Intention from Impact.  Don't get me wrong, I have a long way to go....

So, the book, I think, has made me a bit more in touch with/aware of my feelings and when I rode past the playground, I truly FELT two distinct emotions. It was a great moment...for me, at least :-)

The first was pride. Pride that I was able to give my daughter an experience like going on the moonbounce. In my travels over the years, it's clear to me that experience is what makes Life great, not things.

And the second was sadness. Sadness that, in all likelihood, this carnival would be delayed, postponed, or canceled by the pending storm.

And I guess there were two more. Curiosity...how would Tungsten handle the disappointment of having the carnival delayed/postponed/canceled. And then, Hope. Hope that she would understand that, like we read every night in "Oh, the Places You'll Go," sometimes Life doesn't work out the way you want it to, but you just need to push on.

I wanted to stop and look for her in the throng of kids, savor the moment, take, as we say, a 'mental snapshot.'

But, I was outrunning a boulder...a lone guy on a bike, trying to make it to the safe haven before the "heavens opened up."

Not 2 minutes after I walked through the door did the thunder crack right over our heads and now, it's torrential.