Halls of Fame and Presidents—A Summer Road Trip to Ohio

A few years ago, after a visit to Jefferson’s home at Monticello and Madison’s at Montpelier, the kids developed an appreciation for history and excitement for the Presidents.

Somehow, we came up with the idea that a worthwhile goal would be to visit the home (or some place) associated with each President (and, no, the White House doesn’t count.)

So, when we were thinking about summer vacations, we were using this as a criteria and we discovered that Ohio has connection to 8 Presidents (albeit, some looser than others).

Still, it seemed like a good idea and when we combined our love of football (a visit to the Pro Football Hall of Fame) and Music (the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame), it seemed like a manageable trip.

Day 1 took us from DC to Canton and with summer hours going to 8, we were able to explore the Football HOF with plenty of time to spare. The kids-all of them-loved the history and the interactive exhibits. Even the NFO got into the swing of things.  Any time you have tablet computers and videos, you’re going to do well…which is exactly what happened.

I stopped to pay homage to Joe Gibbs and explain some of the great moments of the game. I am proud to say that it seems to have worked.

Once we were in Canton, OH, it was a very short hop to the William McKinley Memorial and Library. The 25th President was assassinated in 1901 and it’s interesting to think what would have happened if that hadn’t happened…his VP was Teddy Roosevelt.

The Memorial is built on a hill with a significant number of steps leading up to it. Entombed with him are his wife and 2 daughters who, sadly, died when before reaching age 4. It included an impressive biography of his life as well. Adjacent to the Memorial is the Presidential Center which had a mock “street” demonstrating what life looked like in the early 1900s…printing press, saloon, and all.

There was a also a great Science Center which the kids loved.

Afterwards, we headed to the First Ladies’ Historical Site, situated in the family home of Ida McKinley. Alas, it was closed on Monday, but we did get a chance to visit the gift shop, so all was not lost.

Moving at rapid pace, we then visited the Harry London chocolate factory, part of the Fannie Mae family (and now owned by 800Flowers.com) where we not only got to sample some great chocolate (of course), we had the chance to see it being made.  The kids LOVED this in all facets.

They’ve been great travelers, minimal complaints, and enjoying most visits. Of course, family trips with iPads and GPS aren’t what they used to be.

Since the point of this trip (and really all travel) is to widen horizons and instill curiosity, we figured a trip to the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame in Cleveland would fit the bill (and, let’s be honest, I wanted to go there).

While the kids only really knew The Beatles and Elvis Presley (they were surprised that Carly Rae Jepsen and Beyonce weren’t in the HOF yet), they still had a great time. Even Paco (the erstwhile sports fan) said he had more fun at the R&R than at the Football HOF. Go figure.

The most fun part, if you ask me, of any visit is asking the kids what their favorite part was and hearing the unexpected answers, but walking through the big mouth/tongue to the Rolling Stones exhibit did make the cut.

We did have to navigate the museum with some care as (to be expected) there were a few exhibits/comments that weren’t, shall we say, family friendly…

I don’t think the guys picked up on it and we were no worse for the wear. At least now they know who the Rolling Stones are and I think they also know names like The Kinks, Supremes, Stevie Wonder, the Who, the Doors, and ZZ Top, so I would consider it successful.

Tomorrow is our next big Presidential day when we try to get James Garfield in Mentor, OH (interestingly enough, he was also assassinated) and Warren Harding in Merion.

Resilience

Beginning way back in 1998 when I read the book “Adversity Quotient,” I’ve settled on the idea that one of the key determinants for success (beyond talent and skills, etc.) is RESILIENCE.

The ability to dig deep, leave it all on the field, never give up, push on in the face of tremendous odds.

For me, the Tough Mudder was just a practice run for that in real life.

The latest book to drive that home came to me courtesy of my wonderful (seriously) mother-in-law.

It is called The Unthinkable: Who Survives When Disaster Strikes - and Whyand provides anecdotes and evidence about why, ultimately, it’s resilience that matters when a disaster (9/11, Katrina, etc.) occurs.

Do you believe you will make it?

Have you thought about it in the past and previously practiced/convinced yourself that you will make it?

These are critical factors and traits I hope to instill in my kids. That’s why I was super proud when I saw Paco’s basketball camp report card…and the praise he got for pushing as hard as he did.

Shooting, dribbling, etc. All of that comes…but grit. That has to be cultivated.

And it seems like there is a good reason why.

Don’t take advice….

Thanks to a wonderful gift from my pal, Jacob, I’ve been reading/enjoying Jessica Hagy’s book How to Be Interesting: (In 10 Simple Steps)

I particularly liked this chart.

Perspective, courtesy of North Korean refugee

This is powerful.

Reminds you how lucky you are…and how unlucky some are.

 

Jesus’ Home Court Advantage

My son and his friends went to basketball camp at one of the local high school powerhouses last week, Good Counsel.

The actual name of the school is Our Lady of Good Counsel, but somewhere along the line, they misread the sign and started calling it “OLD Lady of Good Counsel.”

But that’s only half the story.

They began to discuss who would win in various sports contests: God or Jesus.

They concluded that, because He is all-powerful, God would be able to take Jesus in basketball, golf, and, well, most events.

However, when asked, “what if the basketball game was played at Good Counsel?” Paco had an astute answer.

“I think God would still win, but it would be close because Jesus would have home court advantage.”

Big Finish

Sometimes you just have to document the funny moments.

I took the girls to the pool the other day and Nadia was enjoying jumping off the side, spread-eagled into the water before swimming over to me.

I told her, “ok, two more.”

She did one, climbed out of the pool and announced, “Time for the BIG FINISH!!”

She’s 5.5.

Good stuff.

1 degree of separation from Chuck D, Flavor Flav, and Public Enemy

I pride myself on my networking skills, but I have to say, I have now taken it to a whole new level.

At the pool the other day, I overhead a couple chatting and made an inserting remark into their conversation.

We got to talking and it turns out that the guy is a member of the rap group, Public Enemy.

James “Bomb” Allen (should I call you “Mr. Bomb?”) and I had a long chat about the history of rap and who the artists they most respected were (Run DMC, LL Cool J, and Beastie Boys) and some of the craziest moments in the band’s history (Redding UK festival where they had no idea where Flavor Flav was and then he just came flying onto the stage).

We also talked about the anti-Semitic controversy in the early 90’s (all a misunderstanding, apparently, according to James.)

Seriously cool guy and down to earth. So was his wife. It was a fun peek into a group that has impacted America.

And all the while, our kids are playing in the pool.

And, in the “street cred” department…before this, I was one step removed from ppl like Obama and Netanyahu, but these are easy.

Now, I’m one degree from Chuck D and Flavor Flav.

BTW, you can follow James on Twitter, if you want.

My 9.5 Year Old on Boys vs. Girls

It's one thing for me to say that men are simple and women are, well, a bit more complex. Not a bad thing, just more complex.

However, it's another thing for my 9 year old daughter.

"Daddy, how come boys have it so easy and girls make things so difficult?

For boys, all you have to do is give them a football and they are happy. With girls, there's always someone fighting or upset with someone. We can't even walk around the track without someone getting upset with someone else."

As her dad, I do my best to help her navigate life's challenges. On this one, I didn't really have an answer.

A Question About Zimmerman Case from a Guy Who Didn’t Really Follow It

I will be the first to say that I didn’t follow the Martin/Zimmerman trial at all.

I heard about it when the shooting occurred and then, believe it or not, didn’t hear anything until Sat. night when Facebook exploded with comments.

So, I really don’t know that much about the particulars of the case. So, in reality, everything after this could be ignorance in a bottle.

That being said, I saw my friend Tjada’s comment and there was something that troubled me about it. (Truth be told, there were others along this line, but this one stood out…Also, Tjada and I go way back on discussing tough issues, so I know she can handle it

For the sake of argument, let’s just all agree for now that the Zimmerman verdict was a total miscarriage of justice.

Here’s where I am running into issues.

If the Zimmerman verdict was a miscarriage of justice and let’s say that race did play a factor, does that necessarily mean that all courts, police officers, and prosecutors are racially biased?

And, isn’t reaching that conclusion the very essence of the Zimmerman case, in some way? (or at least how I understand it).

From what I can gather Zimmerman saw a young black man and immediately drew a generalized conclusion “young black man in wrong neighborhood can only be up to no good” because of a stereotype he had formed.

So, is it equally dangerous to have an incident where one court case in one city in one state that involves the murder of a black man has a miscarriage of justice and then automatically assume that all court cases where a black man is the victim are, by definition, going to be equally unfair/corrupt, etc.?

I suppose I am thinking that the reaction to the court case is precisely because of the danger of stereotypes, yet a statement like ‘scared for all black boys’ implies a stereotype that there’s no real justice in the court system anywhere in America.

Or, maybe I am just missing something here on a deeper level? Definitely possible and won’t be the first time, so help me understand.

Always Eat Left-Handed-Read the Book

My friend, Rohit, has done it again.

I’m often asked about tips and suggestions for being more efficient in my personal/professional life and in engaging others in conversation.

What Rohit has done in his latest book, Always Eat Left Handed: 15 Surprisingly Simple Secrets Of Success is package up many of his tips (which are similar to mine) in a fun, easy to read book. I put the whole thing away in about 3 short sittings and found myself nodding in full agreement (with 1 or 2 exceptions).

What I like about Rohit (as you’ll see in my reviews of his previous books Personality Not Included and Likeonomics) is his refreshing style of writing (it has a lot of personality) and the practicality of his advice.

This one is in Kindle format, is pretty cheap, and will make an immediate impact.

Parenting, the fear of failure, and my failure…

Some of you may recall my challenge 2 years ago when I was trying to help Tonka get over her fear of going down the slide at the pool.

Your advice then was: “back off.”

Well, I’ve failed on that one.

On Friday, July 5th, the girls had camp, so Paco and I decided we would go to Six Flags and have a “guys day.”

We went on a roller coaster and some water slides. Then, we confronted the “Tornado,” which meant we would be in a tube, do a decent sized drop, and fly up the wall on the other side.

When we got to the top—and there was no line!—Paco said he was scared.

I wanted him to confront his fears. I told him….”it’s ok to be afraid, it’s not ok to be paralyzed by fear.”

It may sound melodramatic, but I have a nagging sense that if I let him (or any of my kids) let fear stand in their way, that it will become a habit.

Frankly, I don’t have much patience for adults who can’t get over irrational fears.

At its essence, this is one of my core fathering responsibilities, in my opinion.

We had a 20 minute stand-off at the top of the ride.

He was crying, I was tense. I tried to cajole, empathize, threaten, force, and bribe him…eventually, I lost and we walked down.

Honestly, I felt like a failure.

Maybe I’m being too hard on myself. Maybe next year he’ll be fine.

What I don’t want is a 25 year old son who can’t get over his unnecessary fears so that he can accomplish what that of which he is truly capable.

You tell me the word…

Need a word to describe this situation: 

I'm sitting on a train (i.e. public place) and there's a dude talking way too loudly on his cell phone. I look at the woman across from me and we don't say anything, but it's pretty clear that we're both thinking, "why the heck does this guy have to talk so loud on his phone?"

So, the word I'm looking for describes the moment when you and a total stranger have a moment of non-verbal connection and you both know that you both are thinking the exact same thing.

And Poof, It’s Gone

In the past 2 months, Nadia (age 5.5) has exploded as a reader. She’s also figured out how to shower herself.

So bedtime, which used to consist of the NFO and me giving baths and reading books, has morphed somewhat.

We’ll still read a book to her on occasion, but more often than not, she’s reading to us or just to herself.

All those years of giving baths to the kids have come to an end.

Sure, on occasion, we’ll still do it, but it’s more the exception than the rule now.

I’m ok with it. After all, I didn’t plan on giving them baths at age 25, so it had to end sometime. Still, appreciate the milestone.

On to the next one

Another Reason to Blog…

Elysa Coles Sicard.

Well, sort of.

You see, Elysa and I knew each other when we were both students in Japan in 1997. We saw each other once after that when she lived in DC, but it’s been at least 12 or 13 years…if not more.

She’s been living in Poland and now in France.

We talk every 4 years or so.

The other day was one of them and I was astounded as she recollected and commented on blog posts and observations I had made over the years.

The blog served as a social glue, of sorts, connecting us as friends over time and distance of conversations. Asynchronous friendships. Not the real-time stuff of Facebook, but deeper, allowing her to reflect and ruminate on what I had written and then talk about it live.

There are days when I look at the blog traffic and think, “well, hardly anyone reads,” but then I remind myself that the personal blog is not a professional blog.

It’s a repository for friends to peruse when they feel like it and whether it is one or one hundred posts, it’s a chance to build the connection.

Thank you, Elysa for reminding me of that.

Father-Daughter Tea Party and Solar Exploration…

For the 4th year in a row, Tikkanen and I hosted a Father-Daughter Tea Party. Inspired by the book Strong Fathers, Strong Daughters, we decided it was a great opportunity to have quality 1:1 time and help her friends and their fathers do the same…and serve my special “extra cheesy Mac and Cheese.”

As is our custom, we went around the table and each father/daughter combination said 1 or a few things about the other which s/he appreciated. What was interesting is how the girls have become more comfortable speaking up over the years.

We also had some activities that included:

• decorating cookies together
• making souvenir t-shirts
• writing inspiring notes for each other on stickers
• painting fingernails (well, the dads didn’t get their nails painted, but hey)

These year, we also extended the party into a Solar City House Party, thanks to our pals at Solar City. Each guest had a nice tote bag, made from recycled plastic and we had an opportunity to talk about solar power (albeit not a huge amount b/c, well, 3rd grade girls and solar power are not necessarily the best combination, though it did look like some of the cookies had solar-inspired designs) However, the dads got a big of info and the packet came with a solar power worksheet, some napkins (“Go Solar!”) and a DVD…which we didn’t watch, I’ll admit.

So, this was the first year that the Tea Party had a sponsor and I want to thank Solar City for that. I have to say…from a branding perspective, it’s brilliant because now, with a highly competitive field of solar providers, I think Solar City is moving to the front of the pack in terms of name recall and awareness. Two of the dads are going to investigate for their roofs, so there you go.

Afterwards, I did take a few minutes to explain to Tonka about how solar works.

Anyway, that was a nice side benefit. The real benefit is spending quality time with the girls particularly as they get older, staying involved in a meaningful way, and showing them that it is in fact possible to have a good time with your friends even if the napkins don’t match with the tablecloth and when you serve mac and cheese out of a big bowl.

Allowing Part of Your Life to Waste Away...

Had a demoralizing talk with a longtime friend when I was in New York the other day.

He's been practicing corporate law for almost 20 years. Big Law, as they say, at a firm. Hasn't made partner and finds really no joy in his work.

As he said, "I don't look to work to provide me inspiration."  He has 3 kids, all in private school, and despite jumping around to a few firms, has never been able to find his groove.

In short, he's stuck.

It's sad, but I get where he's coming from. He's got a lifestyle now that requires the income he makes-even if he isn't excited about it-so he can't go anything about it.

I imagine there are parts of most people's lives that feel this way. It could be work, relationships, health, or psychological.

I listened to him and wished I could help him with some sage advice, but what should I tell him?

Obviously, he wants to be satisfied and challenged to his potential...he's that kind of guy...but he's not and, well, I don't see what he could do to bust out of the cycle and fulfill his obligations at the same time.

What am I missing here?

Honoring the True Heroes on Father's Day

If I am not mistaken, the first and only time I visited the World War II Memorial before today was with my grandfather, Stanley Robinson, on Father's Day, 2006.

To honor his memory and his service, I thought it would be nice to take the kids down there today. The two older ones had gone last time, but were too young to remember, and the youngest wasn't born yet.

It gave me a chance to remember him and reflect on his heroism while flying in planes over China, surviving 75 missions, and tell my kids about the sacrifices of the "Greatest Generation."

While we there, we were privileged to see a number of vets who had flown in on the Southwest Airlines Honor Flight (this one from New England) and receive a hero's welcome. It brought tears to my eyes.

Being a father can be a heroic undertaking, but standing in the shadows of these men makes you really appreciate the meaning of the word.

Here's the video.

Half-Marathon—On a trail, in a park

On the bus from the parking lot to the beginning of the North Face Endurance Challenge Half-Marathon at Algonkian State Park, I was chatting with my seatmate.

I told her, “this is my first half-marathon.”

She looked at me, wide-eyed, and said “and you chose to do a TRAIL half for your first one?”

I wasn’t sure what to say, so I said, “well, since I am on the bus to the start line, I think we’re kind of past the point for making that decision.”

And so began my day.

When I signed up for the race, they asked “what is your expected finish time?”

My answer: SUNDAY.

After the Tough Mudder, my teammates said to me, “well, you’re already capable of running 9 or 10 miles at once, you can do a half,” and when the opportunity presented itself, I figured I would go for the challenge.

Standing in line for the pre-run bathroom run, we were chatting with a great guy named Bruce who had done a few marathons and 50 mile races. When he asked me why I had decided to do the half-marathon, I told him.

“Wow. Tough Mudder…that is truly hard core.” I’ll take that.

Anyway, it was a trail run and the first 3 miles were slow, but fine.

As the race wore on, the heat and humidity picked up considerably. There were no water stations between mile 2 and mile 8, so it was getting tough, and with no mile markers in the middle of the woods, it was a bit disorienting. You just didn’t know how far you had gone.  I don’t have one of those GPS watches.

So, roughly between miles 5 and 7.5, I was in a total groove. The kind of groove where you don’t even think about the fact that you are running. It was Zen-like.

Then, we hit a creek that was full of mud and a muddy bank (almost Tough Mudder-like) and it required me to slow down considerably and use my hands. Killed my mojo.

About a mile later, we came to a water station and I hydrated. The sign there said “8.4 miles” but all the runners with watches said, “no, it’s 9.2.”

I figured I had less than 4 miles to go and since I tend to run about 5 miles per day, I felt like I had it in the bag.

I counted chickens a bit early as we shortly hit two hills that must have been 50 degree inclines. All along, my goal had been to just not stop running, no matter how slow, but on these hills, I had no choice. I had to walk.

Fortunately, my running partner, Yak, was with me, even though he is much faster. He claimed ulterior motives—if I finished, I’d be more likely to sign up for a marathon with him. Fair enough.

Those hills-at mile 10-took a ton out of me and I was soon relieved to hear someone say “only 2 miles to go from here.”

I mentally calculated how much energy I needed (I knew the last 2 miles were flat) and set off. I ran for what seemed like 12 minutes or so and then came to a water station where I was informed I had 1.65 miles to go.

What?!!!!!

I was basically running on fumes and I still wasn’t done. I had miscalculated the burn. All of that resulted in a pretty long last 1.5 mile of the run.

Yet, that’s the part of the activity that I love the best. In some ways, it’s the reason I do it. The physical challenge is great, but the mental challenge is what makes it special. When your body wants to give up, but you force yourself to go on anyway.

And, so I did.

Then, you hear the crowd (no spectators on the course b/c of the trail) at the finish area and you are uplifted…

They brought me home.

Considering the heat, it was my first time, and the fact that I had a calf spasm that required a house call by a physician friend, icing, and massage on the day before, I am thrilled with the 2.40 time I posted.

Next challenge? Open to suggestions.

A Night at the Ballet

As many of you know, the NFO is a serious dancer. So, it’s no surprise that Tonka and Nadia and, to some extent, Paco, are also fans of dance.

So, it was particularly fun to take them out (on a school night, no less!) to see Ballet Across America at the Kennedy Center.

If you’ve been there, you know what a great environment it is all the way around. The Halls of Nations and States, the huge bust of Kennedy, the river overlook, and the great rooms for the performances (we were in the Opera House), so they really enjoyed that.

We only made it for 2 of the 3 Acts (people were getting antsy), but we were priviliged to see the Richmond Ballet perform a piece that was inspired by the ghettos of WWII.

From the website:

Premiered in the Richmond Ballet (Stoner Winslett, Artistic Director) New Works Festival,Ershter Vals features music based on poems from the Jewish ghettos of World War II. The captivating choreography focuses the ballet on the moments of light that can be found in even the darkest of times, creating a penetrating message of hope.

The music that accompanied it was all Yiddish and I, who would not call myself a ballet aficionado (though I am certainly on the cusp) found myself mesmerized and really enjoying the right brain expansion that was taking place.

The kids had a lot of questions and we had to remind them to hold them until the intermission. All in all, they handled themselves quite well.

The second act was a bit more difficult. There was NO music whatsoever and the moments of total silence were a bit awkward. Still, the movements were graceful.

While I enjoyed the dance (really), I really enjoyed watching the kids enjoy the dance and be captivated, wide-eyed, and wondering about not only the dance, but everything…the chandeliers, the orchestra, the lighting, and the steep stairs.

I love the challenge of giving the kids new experiences to help shape their minds into flexible, dynamic, creative organs.

Does the mission change when the passengers change?

I really don’t think this will translate well to the blog, but here goes anyway…
I was dropping Paco off at his friend, Josh Daniels’ house. (names are changed to protect innocent).
Nadia was with me. We had walked over.
When I arrived there, I saw that another family, the Smiths were there for lunch.
The Smiths know where I live and said, “Oh, are you headed back to your house?”
I told them I was.
“Our daughter, Gina (age 8), is going to her friend, Amy King, who lives down the street from you.”
I responded, “I’m happy to take her there now,” seeing as Gina would be able to get to Amy’s house anywhere from 1 to 2 hours earlier than if she waited for her family to finish lunch.
At first, Gina (who has knows me—she’s in the same grade as Paco), indicated she would rather stay with her family, but while I was organizing the return plans for Paco, Gina changed her mind.
No skin off my back, I was headed in the direction of the King’s anyway.
So, Gina, Nadia, and I left the Daniels’ house and headed for my street.
Where things get interesting….
Along the way, I saw my friend, Jon Cole, walk out his front door and, since we were at the halfway point, I turned to the girls and said “do either of you need a bathroom stop?”
I had been walking with Nadia for about 45 minutes and if there’s one thing in which I believe in, it’s pre-emptive bathroom visits.
Both of the girls said no.
Jon said, “hey, you want to come in for a few minutes just to chat?”
I said, “well, are you guys having dessert? Maybe I can hook up the girls with a cookie?”
He said, “yes, we’re having dessert.”
Turning to the girls, I offered them a cookie. Nadia said she was interested. Gina said she wasn’t.
Now, you should know that Gina had never met the Cole’s before, but my assessment of her character was that she is pretty happy, go-lucky (we had been chatting along the way) and that a short detour wouldn’t be a big deal.
We went in, the girls sat on the couch and we were there for a maximum of 10 minutes. We took our leave and I safely delivered Gina to Amy’s house.
The Questions and The Controversy
Here’s where you get to vote/decide/weigh-in.
The NFO thinks that once I accept the responsibility for delivering Gina to Amy’s, I have no right to detour from that mission.
I think that since I am doing Gina and the Smiths a favor (one I am happy to do), that I am able to keep some degree of flexibility in how I get her there.  I would agree that a visit to the Cole’s of 2 hours would be excessive, so there is some point (for me, it was more than 10 minutes), at which point it is simply not right to stay and not fair to Gina. In my view, Gina comes out WAY ahead in terms of when she gets to Amy’s house, regardless of whether I stop at the Cole’s or not.
The NFO, however, disagrees and thinks that the point is 0 minutes. Once I take the job, I lose all flexibility.
Analogous might be….you offer to give your friend’s child a ride to your next door neighbor’s house from soccer practice. On the way, you pass the drugstore and you remember that you forgot to pick up a birthday card for your Mom. You see an opportunity to get it.
Is it ok to park, run in with the 2 kids, get the card, and run out? (assuming it is 10 minutes or less AND there’s no explicit time expectation for when your friend’s child will arrive at your neighbors)
Anyway, as I said, it doesn’t translate perfectly, so fire away.

Going Big in Vegas..

I was in Las Vegas last week for a 3 day group off-site.
On the one hand, Las Vegas represents the worst side of humanity. Yet, I still can’t help but admire the massive engineering accomplishments, the organizational efficiency, the sophisticated technology and infrastructure.
While I was there, some of the younger people on my team were encouraging me to “go big” in terms of partying/drinking, etc. Now, I was up later just because I spent time socializing with teammates (and combined with jet lag and poor sleeping), I already pushed it, but I couldn’t justify going even further. And we’ll leave out the fact that I’m training for a half-marathon.
When asked, I said,
“Look you have to understand something.”
“I could definitely go big here, but let me tell you how the story unfolds.  I go big for 3 nights. Then, I get home and my wife says to me, ‘hi, I’ve been 1 on 3 with the kids for 4 days, so I need a rest.
Now, her position is totally justified because being on point with the kids is the toughest job around (and ours are even at a bit of an easier stage).
So, to be honest, I just don’t see a good result when I say in response that, ‘you know, I went really big in Vegas and partied a lot, so I need a few days to recover.’
As a result, I’m going to bed now. See you later.”

2 Free Hotel Nights in Vegas-Interested?

Read disclaimer at bottom first before going further.

So, I won 2 nights at a hotel in Las Vegas (MGM Grand) and I am not going to be able to redeem them.

However, I want someone to benefit from them.

Here’s the offer.

(I will choose the best entry using my personal judgment and own criteria).

1. What makes Vegas intriguing to you?
2. How will your trip to Vegas benefit this blog community?
3. Are there any other “remarkable” reasons why you should get these 2 free nights?
   Get as creative as you like.

Please note:

• All entries must be submitted as comments to this blog post
• Deadline for submissions is June 9, 2013

 

DISCLAIMER: I am trying to do something nice and fun. I want to give my friends/community a chance to benefit and I don’t want to involve a lawyer or extraneous costs.  If you can’t deal with the fact that you might lose and that I am not going to write a whole long set of terms/conditions, don’t bother submitting an entry. If you’re that annoying, you should find another blog to read anyway. 

Laughing when facing a mortal disease…

This blog post is dedicated to my friend, Tom Siegman. I called him on his birthday the other day and he said, “hey man, keep on blogging.”

A few days ago, a friend of ours passed away. He was young, too young. Blogged on it here.

In the months leading up to this, people had the opportunity to go visit him and spend some time with him, just to keep him company during his time in between chemo, etc.

Last summer, I spent 2 hours with him and we spent the first hour talking about serious things, like American foreign policy, educational systems, the rise of China, etc.

At some point, talk turned to his illness. He couldn’t really eat food. He would get his nutrients through an IV, but he would drink just to avoid feeling parched and then, as I understand it, most of it would just go straight out of a tube in his stomach to the bag he carried around with him.

Now, I’m not sure exactly how we got the idea, but at some point (knowing me, it was probably I who came up with it), we realized that he could drink as much alcohol as he wanted and not get drunk.

From there, the plan we hatched was to go to the University of Maryland and challenge all of the frat boys to drinking contests for money. We saw an opportunity for him to “monetize his illness.” We both had a good laugh at this.

Now, some may think this crass, but what I think it represented for Gordon (and for all of us) is the ability to keep a light-hearted spirit during times of tremendous strain.

The gravity of the situation wasn’t lost on us, but the fact that we were able to have a laugh at the same time is, I think something that is commendable—mostly for him, as I wasn’t faced with the issue, of course.

I do recall reading somewhere (and I can’t remember right now where it was), that people who can laugh when faced with serious challenges are more likely to persevere than those who cannot.

In the long run, the disease got Gordon, but from all accounts, and from what I saw, he was a true fighter all along the way. I suspect this type of attitude had something to do with it.

For the aspiring medical practitioners among you...

In the spirit of bringing hiqh quality medical procedures to the world, here's the latest.

Inspired Design, Hong Kong Style

Now this is simply remarkable.

College Isn't Really Worth It

The joke here isn't the segment from the Daily Show. The joke is that most ppl think the segment is a joke.
Thanks to Mindy Barenblat for the link.

The Daily Show with Jon Stewart
Get More: Daily Show Full Episodes,Indecision Political Humor,The Daily Show on Facebook

The Death of a Friend and the Injustice of Life's Realities

I held the kids a little bit closer this afternoon. The sun seemed brighter and the air felt fresher.

Our weekend had been sent into a very dark place on Saturday morning when we learned of the passing of our friend, Gordon Lederman. Aged 44, 3 kids under the age of 7, and one of the absolute nicest guys you'll ever meet.

A funeral for a new, young widow on Mother's Day brought everything into focus in terms of life's priorities.

The unjustice of it all. The inability to comprehend it all.  Why someone who had devoted so much to his family, his community and his country had to be taken from all of us after a fierce battle with cancer.

I had spent an afternoon with Gordon last summer and his spirits were high, his resolve unwavering.  Yesterday, as the NFO and I processed the news, I berated myself a bit for not having spent more time with him, for letting my petty issues and concerns get in the way.

Last night, one of the funeral organizers emailed and asked if I would be able to organize a livestream of the funeral for those who couldn't attend.

Sensing an opportunity to give to Gordon something that I did not enough when he was alive, I agreed.  During the funeral, I noticed that 27 different viewers were able to participate in the experience. I figured that some were watching with others and was able to take a small bit of comfort that 40 or so people were able to watch as a result.

That's a small aside, of course, to the much larger tragedy.  We spent a great deal of the weekend trying to comprehend it all, feeling sad for his wife, but absolutely heartbroken for his 3 children. That's what had me choked up, more than anything.  It made me hold my own kids a bit closer today and we tried to explain to them what had happened in as real terms as possible.

It's something that the NFO and I do a lot. I feel good about the non-sugar coating approach we take. Life has realities and we're not trying to scare them, but we do need to prepare them.

However, for something like this, I just don't think it's possible to be truly prepared.

I sense I'm rambling and a bit all over the place now...I just feel the need to get it out, even though I can't really understand it. I am sorry for that.

But it is nothing compared to the sorrow I feel for his family.  I truly hope that they have the strength to persevere through this horrific experience and flourish nonetheless.

(If you knew Gordon and are motivated, here's the video of the funeral. Apologies for the ads and poor audio.)

Gender Discrimination in Loan Docs?

We just refinanced our mortgage.

I was surprised by the language in the first sentence. A relic of a different era?

Running the Dish

As is my custom on any business trip, I make a point to do something unique to the area.

Proud to report that I “ran the Dish” at Stanford recently. A great-almost 4 mile course-around a huge radio telescope.

The experience provided fantastic vistas combined with great hill work.

I don’t usually drive to do a run, but since 2 different people recommended that I do it, I figured it was worth a shot…and it was.

Biased or Fair?

I read this article,  Montgomery County workers took $30,000 hit since recession,  in our local newspaper and I was so taken aback by its one-sided nature that I wrote a letter to the editor and the reporter.

What I wrote is below. Tell me if I'm wrong.

To the Editor,

I read Ms. Alexander's article, Montgomery County workers took $30,000 hit since recession, and the first thought that came to my mind was, "I wonder how much the County Employees Union paid her to write this?"

No one enjoys a pay cut. No one enjoys having to cut back or facing financial hardship. However, in your numerous stories of County employees who have taken a financial hit, nowhere did you mention the alternatives to the pay freeze.

• Would it have been better to raise taxes on the citizens of the county so that the employees didn't have to make the sacrifices you covered?
• Were there services that should have been cut instead?
• What about layoffs? Maybe it would have been better to fire the worst performers in the workforce and allow everyone else to keep their salaries at the level they wished?

I don't know what the better answer is or would have been, but your article didn't even present that topic for consideration. As a person, I share their anxiety. As a taxpayer in the County, I am entitled to have that information and make the best decision.  Your article had an agenda. "It's not fair what has happened to the employees of MontCo and you should be upset about it."  Maybe yes, maybe no, but you didn't give us that option. You tried to force our hand.

In the private sector, if a company does poorly, employees sometimes sacrifice. Either in pay freezes, reductions, or lay-offs. It's unfortunate, but these are the trade-offs inherent in our economic system (or any economic system, for that matter).

By not painting the full picture of the trade-offs, you do a disservice to your readership, particularly one which is immediately impacted. I'm not reading about a company that didn't sell enough and had to lay people off, I am reading about a situation where I am being asked to either directly pay more in taxes so that others don't have to sacrifice, receive less services, or accept the fact that some fellow citizens may get laid off from their jobs.

Regardless of what is optimal, if you want an informed citizenry, you should focus on presenting the full story, not what appears to be an advertorial.

Tough Mudder #2…in the books

Not sure exactly what it is about running 12 miles on a cold, windy day through the hills of West Virginia and stopping every so often to deal with one of 22 obstacles that I enjoy, but whatever it is, I like it.

Maybe the rush, the mental challenge that is required to run through electrified wires and crawl through mud (as well as the physical), but I gave it another whirl this past Sunday at Tough Mudder Mid-Atlantic.

Here are the pics. Videos below.

This one was tougher than Tough Mudder #1 for me because

1. it was about 1.5 miles longer
2. whereas NJ is flat, West Virginia isn’t
3. it was colder
4. it was windier
5. it had more water involved

Still, the team performed beautifully (and I liked the fact that this time I had a group of people to do it with).

 

Lack of Sleep. Lack of Perspective.

The last few weeks have been hectic, more so than usual. If I was lucky, I was getting 5 hours of sleep a night.

I know. Not enough, but such was the scenario.  As you know, you can only go so long at that rate before it catches up with you...in many ways.

One, was particularly unfortunate.

One of my trusted service providers (whatever she says, I'll pretty much do) emailed me to discuss a situation. I called her. It was early in the morning. I was exhausted and trying to help the NFO get the kids out the door to school.

She started listing Option A, Option B, Option C...doing her job, giving me all the scenarios.  I replied, perhaps a bit too sternly, "Look, don't tell me the Options, you're the expert, just tell me what I should do. I trust you and I'll do it!"

Normally, that's a sign of confidence, but in this scenario, it rubbed her the wrong way and she laid into me. She, too, was exhausted, but for a different reason. Aside from the relentless demands of her job, her husband had just been diagnosed with pancreatic cancer and the last thing she needed was for me, anyone, to speak roughly to her.

I felt about 1 inch tall and, naturally, apologized profusely.  Had I not been so tired, I probably would have been more calm about it, but it as the proverbial wake-up call (pun not intended, it just came out that way) that, no matter how much you think you get done, you can't avoid the need for sleep.  

I felt terrible.  

That night, I went to bed early and got 8 hours.

Gratitude to my Son

About 4 months ago, Paco came to me and told me he was in the middle of book #3 of the Harry Potter series.

I had only read the first one...about 14 years ago, but he seemed pretty excited about it.

He also proclaimed quite clearly, "I think I am going to beat you."

"In what contest?" I asked.

"I am going to finish all of the books before you do."

I realized that he would--he has a bit more time than I do--but I also sensed an opportunity.  I saw that he was very excited about Harry and Voldemort and that it provided a chance for me to bond with him.

So, I devoured the final 6 books over the course of 3 months, savoring the chance to discuss them with him as I did, but realizing that I really enjoyed the books in their own right.

Without his prodding, I never would have read them, so I am just grateful for his encouragement.  Looks like I have a lot to learn from the kids.

The taxi driver from Jeremy

Well, turns out he is really from Jérémie, a city in Haiti, but we had a fun moment in New York City the other day.  

I had been calling a few people and when I was done, I started chatting with the cabbie (as is my custom).  I asked where he was from and he said "Haiti."

"Port au Prince?" I asked, trying to sound smart.

"No, from Jeremy."

"What?"
"Yes. And when I heard your name, I thought it was funny."

After I chided him (playfully) for not saying something sooner, I shot this video.  Now, I have a travel destination (since I've already been to Epstein!).

Running the Cherry Blossom 10 Miler

Washington is definitely one of America's most beautiful cities and on Sunday morning, April 7th, I was reminded of that.

I ran in the Cherry Blossom 10 miler which began at the Washington Monument, over Memorial Bridge to Arlington, past the Lincoln Memorial, Kennedy Center, MLK memorial, Jefferson Memorial and all along the Potomac River and Tidal Basin.  

It was a glorious day and I was shooting for a time of 90 minutes. Inspired by the weather, the crowds, and adrenaline, I managed to complete the course in 1 hour 24 minutes, so I was thrilled. I was even more excited that I ran the 2nd 5 miles at a faster rate than the first 5. (For details, see JEREMY EPSTEIN Results:)

All of those mornings running in the freezing weather had paid off. It's great when hard work does that.

There's something special about races (and I don't do that many), but I love the camraderie of the runners and I love the random kindness of the audience.

People will read your running bib and yell "Way to go, Jeremy!" and it's fun. The signs are great too, such as "Hey Random Stranger, I'm proud of you!"  and the folks who were (unofficially) handing out Oreos and Beer. 

A big thanks goes out to my friend, Dr. David Taragin (some ppl think he is Will Farrell's doppelganger) for the VIP parking and access to the medical tent for safekeeping of my belongings.

It's a great event, a great way to spend a Sunday morning, and a great way to appreciate the beauty of the Nation's Capital

A Great Golf Story

I am not a particularly big fan of golf. I don’t play it and find it boring to watch.

Yet, somehow, I was drawn into reading a phenomenal book called The Match: The Day the Game of Golf Changed Forever and I couldn’t put it down.

It describes a little known event involving 4 of the game’s greatest players and how they fought it for the pure sport of it.

Written by the same author who wrote Greatest Game Ever Played, the story is riveting and raised my appreciation of the sport about 100-fold.

When I lived in Europe, I fell in love with soccer (er, football) and realized that just because I didn’t understand a sport didn’t mean there wasn’t something beautiful about it.

What this book showed me was how beautiful golf is.

And the storytelling is world-class.

Devoted Parent Example...Non-Parents should avoid reading

On the way back from Chicago following Passover, Nadia got car sick. Unfortunate. Smelly. Messy.

A total of 3 times.

The first one was all over her. We stopped, cleaned her up, and proceeded.

The 2nd time she managed to get it into a plastic bag. Well done!

The 3rd time (poor girl), she knew it was coming and tried to stop it by putting her hand in front of her mouth.  Because she had spaces in between her fingers, this had the effect of creating a greater force on the projectiles which did get past her.

She was sitting right behind me.

Travelling at 80 mph on the Interstate, all I could do was stay focused on the road as the bits and pieces of vomit landed on the back of my head and neck.

Got a wipe, cleaned it off, and moved on.

“They’re not telling anyone.”

I heard some bad news a few weeks ago. Actually, I discovered it by accident, when a friend of mine let it slip that a mutual friend from college had recently been diagnosed with cancer.

“But,” he said, “they’re not telling anyone. In fact, his mom thinks it should be a total secret.”

Now, it’s pretty well known that I don’t mind sharing my medical condition publicly (see here for thyroid cancer story), but I need some of my introvert friends to explain this approach to me.

Assuming that the medical condition is not because of something you did like shoot up heroin with drug addicts in Thailand or whatever and it’s not your fault at all, why keep it a secret?

If it’s not a secret, your friends (whose help you need), can help you.

What’s more, when it’s a secret, people actually talk about it MORE.

When everyone knows, it’s not news anymore.

So, the “we’re not talking about it,” seems like it defeats the purpose of secrecy since everyone kind of knows anyway.

What am I missing here?

Ordinary Dad Day

I came home from a long road trip thinking “I need to recalibrate and focus on the kids.”

So, when they got home from school, I made a point to go outside and just toss the football with Paco, to listen to Tonka as she relayed in extreme detail how she fulfilled her duty as class representative, helped them with some math challenges on the iPad, and read Amelia Bedelia with Nadia (who is making fantastic strides).

After showers, Paco and I played an improvised basketball game which had me rolling on the floor laughing, my stomach and cheeks were hurting.

I stared in wonderment as Nadia sounded at the words and I took a “mental snapshot,” thinking that this was the time I should be cherishing.

And I did.

Later that night, I watched this emotional video that my own mom sent me and it all felt right.

It’s not easy-daily-to do this, which is why these reminders are so poignant.

I blog about them because it helps make me remember to focus and cherish.

 

A flight from Dallas and a BIG lesson about pre-judging

On my way back to DC from Austin (via Dallas), I found myself in my preferred aisle seat, but with 2 passengers to my right.

Once the doors were closed, I noticed that the seat one row in front of me, across aisle (and still on the aisle) was open, with no one in the middle seat.

Needless to say, I immediately grabbed it.

I was doing my work and when the flight attendant came by to ask for drinks, I started chatting with the gentleman in my row, seated next to the window.

It’s probably not a big surprise to you, but I tend to be one of those “plane talkers” and have many a good friend made on various flights.

As we chatted, I learned that this guy was also in technology, his company develops some cool mapping/data software for school buses, but-and I’m a bit scared to admit this-when he told me that he had programmers/development teams in Karachi and Abu Dhabi, I did start doing the calculation of “ok, what is my Jewish/Israel strategy for this conversation?”

I’d be lying if my first thought wasn’t, “this guy probably is anti-Israel at the least and at the worst, pro-Hamas or something like that,” and well, after a really long day, I wasn’t up for a fight. (And yes, that HAS happened to me before.)

Now, I am quite embarrassed and ashamed to admit that I fell into this trap because I could not have been more wrong.

Not only was Amir ridiculously nice, engaging, smart, etc., but it turns out that he had spent a few years working for an Israeli company (which, let’s be honest, would be enough to make even some Jews anti-Israeli), and came out with not only some admiration for their approach (well, not all of it), but recognition that some of what he had learned as a child in Pakistan (he emigrated to the US when he was 18), wasn’t so accurate.

Our conversation was enhanced at one point because I demonstrated a bit of that age old Jewish gift of chutzpah by asking the flight attendant, “hey, don’t you guys have any peanuts or pretzels back there?”

Her response was “what planet are you living on honey?” (but in a humorous way.)

Amir was skeptical, but I said, “hey, if you don’t ask, you never get.”

And, wouldn’t you know it, but a few minutes later, the flight attendant, Jan, shows up with a basket of nuts which were from the First Class cabin.

Amir was pretty surprised to say the least. I was riding the high that comes from being rewarded from chutzpah (something that doesn’t always happen, that’s for sure) and feeling validated.

At that point, Jan and I struck up a deeper conversation and I got a nice chunk of her life story, as well as promised to send a note to the American Airlines customer service team (which I have).  What can I say? I was feeling chatty.

A bit later, Jan returns, bringing 2 meals from the First Class cabin and asking “what kind of wine does your wife drink?”

Amir being Muslim and I being married to the NFO who is, well, the NFO, both said “my wife doesn’t drink wine,” which made Jan happy because she could then take it to her hotel room (she’d had a long day, so good for her!)

The only downside of our lengthy chat was that I neglected some of my planned work on the plane, but hey, I made it up in the cab and it was mega-worth it. In addition to our common technology-world lives, we both have 3 kids which are (sort of) the same age and we’re only 1 year apart in age.

Just a solid guy.

The conversation was fruitful, enlightening, and memorable. I learned a lot about Pakistan, Geo-location technology, and, most of all, the importance of not rushing to judgment.

For that, I feel very, very bad and mildly ashamed and I intend to carry this lesson with me for a long time.
We can call it the “Amir Principle.”

The corollary to that is the “Jan Principle.” Be nice to flight attendants and don’t be afraid of a bit of chutzpah (Amir’s newest Yiddish/Hebrew word, btw.)….You never know what might show up on your tray table.

The Epstein Top 5 (or 10) Tips for Just About Everything

As part of my 40th birthday celebrations, the NFO asked my family to submit their TOP 5 OR 10 LIST for various things they either experienced with me, learned from me, taught me, or just had for me.  Herewith, the amassed knowledge of the Epstein family.
ASHER
Jeremy’s Rule for Entrepreneurs

1. 1. Never stop marketing
2. 2. Never forget rule number 1
3. 3. Leave it all on the field everyday
4. 4. Be remarkable (positive when possible)
5. 5. Nurture the network

BARAK
Language:

1. 1) Immerse yourself in the culture.
2. 2) Talk to anyone, at anytime, about anything.
3. 3) Study.
4. 4) Believe that you can do it. This is a test of will.
5. 5) Love the process.

Lessons from Living with Jeremy:
1) Passion is key. If it is not present, manufacture it.
2) Adventure exists in the mind.
3) Never give up.
4) You will always win the game if you make the rules.
5) If you are not in a position to make the rules, charm the hell out of your adversaries.
6) If you cannot charm your adversaries, give up and move on, or change.
7) If you cannot change, find someone who will make you.
8) If you cannot find such a person, find an offbeat adventure to re-energize yourself.
9) Never give up.
10) Even if you live life with unusual seriousness, be the guy who laughs loudest at the dumbest, most sophomoric movies around.



DINA

Top 5 ways to make a lasting, unique and positive impression

1. 1. Every interaction is a chance to make a positive impression. Take the extra few minutes to draft a vivid, detail-filled email, note, or speech and use imagery in your language to help people remember you and your message ("there I was, standing in the rain, teeth chattering and mascara dripping down my face when I came up with the idea to invent the umbrella" is much more memorable than "Rainy days are wet. That's why I invented the umbrella.").
2. Don't be afraid to add some of your own personality to interactions. Related to this: If you don't have any personality, try to get some pronto.
3. Be honest about your strengths and weaknesses. Being genuine builds trust and goes farther than being "impressive" but phony. For example, I can't drive stick shift but I'm great at parallel parking.
4. Visualize your best, most confident, most relaxed self before entering any new situation; use that energy to help you make a positive first impression. In other words, imagine what you would do if you were Joe Biden, not Woody Allen.
5. Never ask a woman when the baby is due.

KIRA

1. 1. Trust that you are working on their behalf and confidence you can do it
2. 2. Knowledge about the market/their needs/their wants and even those they don't think about (if they are pregnant they don't want a walk up, but may not occur to them. Point it out, but they may not care.)
3. 3. Referral from a friend they trust
4. 4. Respond to all emails and calls in a timely fashion
5. 5. Make the feel like they are the only client you have and arent too busy for them, but casually let them know you have others without bragging.

Top 10 Travel Tips
David Epstein
March 2013

1. “Norway of the Mind.” The phrase I invented while in Oslo and traveling with an adult child to express the concept that what you know about the history and culture of your destination country is a key to understanding what you will see and the people with whom you will talk. Therefore, read books, e.g., history, literature, fiction written by indigenous authors about their society, and ask questions of its inhabitants initially extending on what you are learning by reading. Focus your reading throughout the trip on where you are, not elsewhere.
2. Have one or several broad themes for your trip, e.g., Italy, the Roman Empire or the Renaissance; Australia, European colonization and interaction with Aboriginals; Soviet Union and the late, unlamented German Democratic Republic, totalitarian societies and those based on individual freedom; South Africa, new South Africa after the collapse of apartheid; Hong Kong, for the handover from the United Kingdom to China in 1997; Northern Ireland for its post-agreement elections in 1998.
3. Let the trip unfold so you are flexible as to where you go and when. If you arrive at a capital city, stay overnight at a pre-reserved hotel, and then immediately leave the capital city to travel around the country, making choices as to what to visit and where you stay as you travel, saving your exploration of the capital city to the end. Use organized package tours only where conditions require.

1. Do not have expectations or a long list of “must see,” so that you will not be disappointed. On the other hand, do not say, “I will avoid that site because that is where the tourists go.” There is a reason the site attracts visitors.

1. Do not obsess about minor setbacks, e.g., lost luggage, bad meals, closed museums, or being overcharged.

1. If traveling with an adolescent child, make visits to museum no longer than an hour or so. You are teaching curiosity, not overwhelming the child with content.

1. If traveling with an employed adult child, he or she pays for the airfare to the destination. Thus, the adult child has a financial investment in the trip and is also discouraged from hoarding frequent flyer points. Parent can pay for ground expenses, defined as those expenses directly related to food, lodging, attraction tickets, guides, most but not all internal travel. This view will lead to delicious discussions in setting the boundaries.

1. In a new city, first take a bus tour for the overview. Hire a good personal guide at an important site who knows the subject matter and does not tell lame jokes.

1. All family travel is good, but your choices will be challenged within the group, as different interests are expressed. One-on-one travel for a parent with a teen age or adult child is the best, as you are then companions facing the challenges and joys of travel without the need to referee disputes.

1. Use the trip as the opportunity for long and searching conversations. Have an ongoing dialogue with your traveling companion (s) both on what you are learning as well as on any other topic, personal or general.

ELLEN EPSTEIN
5. Never do ONE thing when you can do three or four things simultaneously.
4. Remember the acronym F.A.T: FILE It; ACT on it; TRASH it. Only touch a piece of paper once.
3. Label your cables: (Jeremy knows all of this already)
Organize, store and buy computer cables wisely
by David Caolo on Jan 24, 2013
Step one: know your cables

1. USB to mini USB You’ll notice one end is a flat rectangle shape and the other is a small trapezoid shape. These are often used with digital cameras and often short, in the 1–3 foot range.
2. FireWire 800 These feature a squared-off end with a plastic“bit” in the center. FireWire 800 cables are typically used on high-end external hard drives and some video equipment. They transfer large files between machines and drives quickly.
3. Standard USB One end features a flat rectangle and the other a square with once side slightly rounded. Many printers uses these cables, as well as some external hard drives.
4. FireWire 400 Which, is also called “1394 cable” in some circles. Also used for storage peripherals like hard drives and some older video cameras. Transfer speed is slightly slower than that of its sibling FireWire 800.
5. DVI These cables end with a wide terminator with many pins and two screws to hold it in place. You’ll find that many computer monitors and projectors use these. Length can vary greatly, but most are around 3 feet long.
2. Get rid of Paper (Jeremy is almost Paperless!)
The latest model in the ScanSnap desktop line is the iX500 and it’s an impressive machine. I’ve been test driving one the past two weeks (thank you, ScanSnap!) and it’s amazing — it doesn’t require a desktop computer to launch, it will scan straight to a mobile device or an online storage location over Wifi (so I can save straight to Dropbox), it’s noticeably faster than the S1500M model we own, and I’ve been able to customize it to send scans automatically to whatever program I want, so items like photographs now import straight into iPhoto. I won’t upgrade permanently from the S1500M we already have, but if we didn’t have a scanner I would save up for this one. If you’re in the market for one, the list price is $495. They’re expensive, but they’re really nice. (Full iX500 product details.)
As far as shredders go, I’d recommend the Fellowes PowerShred 79Ci now. The thing is a monster at chewing up stuff you want to shred. And, as I referenced earlier, it’s on wheels, which makes it convenient to use and store. It’s also expensive, but the thing will last you a decade or more if you treat it well. OurPowerShred PS-77Cs is still rocking after seven years of service, and we use it daily. Unlike less expensive shredders, the PowerShred line is built to last.
The list of things to shred and not to shred is still accurate, though a lot of people greatly dislike my advice to destroy old passports. I probably should have written more clearly about waiting to shred the old passport until after you get a new one. Submitting your old one does speed up the renewal process. However, once you get the old one back, if you don’t need it for any legal reason, it’s safe to shred (just be sure to pop out the RFID chip first). My last passport, though used many times, didn’t even have a single stamp in it because so many countries have stopped stamping and my old visa had to be relinquished when I left the country that required me to have the visa. If you want to keep old passports, especially if they have stamps in them, do it but please keep it in a safe or safe-deposit box so it doesn’t end up in the hands of identity thieves.
Even with all of these products and systems, paper continues to be something we have to deal with daily in our home. We’ve unsubscribed from as much junk mail as possible, yet we still get some from businesses and services we use. The shredder, trash can, and recycling bin by our main entrance are essential in dealing with the junk immediately and not letting it come deep inside the house. But, the stuff we let in voluntarily —the bank statements, the receipts, the pay stubs, the contracts — still feels overwhelming at times. We’ve gone so far as to unsubscribe from all print magazines and now subscribe to these publications digitally over Zinio. The only way we’ve been able to keep from being overwhelmed by paper is to clear our desks each day as part of our end-of-day work routines. All papers filed, junk shred, receipts reconciled, documents scanned, etc. It only takes five or ten minutes, but it’s still a chore. I’m looking forward to the day when I only have to spend five or ten minutes a week (or less) dealing with paper clutter.
1. Hair is clutter (Jeremy also knows this!)
Eschew the trappings of our vain and materialistic culture by shaving your head. Did you know that you can replace the following items with a single razor and a can of shaving cream?

1. 1. Combs
2. 2. Brushes
3. 3. Shampoo
4. 4. Conditioner
5. 5. “Product” (Gels, Mousses, Waxes)
6. 6. Scrunchies (N/A to Jeremy!)
7. 7. Barrettes (Ditto!)
8. 8. Hairdryer

It’s a practical and stylish approach that is surprising versatile–it works whether you look like Natalie Portman or Telly Savalas. And with all the money you save on haircuts you’ll be able to buy cool white clothing lifestyle that most minimalists only dream of.
Here are my tips that got lost. Please enjoy them!!
Love, MOM

Fleeting Moments

The other day, our youngest (aka Nadia), went for her "interview" at kindergarten.

Normally, the two older ones (Tonka & Paco) leave at 7.30 and Nadia leaves around 9.  That extra 90 minutes is sometimes easy, but often times filled with drama as we fight w/Nadia about what clothes she is going to wear.  It's usually my least favorite part of the day.

Some days, she's great and it's no big deal, but some days, I wish it was over.

So, when she left at 7.30 for her "interview," I got a taste of what it would be like when it was over. The house was quest at 7.40am...the NFO had driven carpool...and I took a moment to recognize that, as my mom accurately says, "the days are long, but the years are short."

Indeed they are.

Just like that, our littlest girl is going to be a kindergartner.

Sunrise, sunset.

Is a 529 Plan Worth It?

I’ve had this discussion recently with 3 people.

And not about “oh, is it a good investment” kind of discussion, but a different chat that goes at the fundamental underlying assumption:

Is COLLEGE really worth it anymore? In its current incarnation, that is.

That’s not to say that education and credentials aren’t worth it, they certainly are, but are colleges actually preparing our kids for the future?

I don’t believe they are and, right now, I am in the minority, but it is growing.

At least, I am starting to see more and more smart people start to ask the right/tough questions.

Here is one of my favorite VC’s (Fred Wilson) talking about it. Worth the watch about the potential future of online higher education.

40 Years Old: Getting ready for the 2nd half...

Not looking to grab any birthday wishes, but today I turn 40 years old.  

I am not dreading it or anything. In fact, I'm embracing it.  My theme for the past 2-3 months has been "Getting Ready for the 2nd Half."

Now, no one knows the time of his birth or death, so this may be wishful thinking, but it's more slogan than fact.

The pending birthday provided a catalyst for focusing on 

• health (staying the course on exercise, after all, prepping for Tough Mudder II)
• wellness (Lasik-video here + dental surgery)
• career (what exactly do I want to be when I grow up?)
• friends (am I being a good friend?)
• and, most importantly, family (am I the kind of husband/father I want to be?)

It's not like I went to a sweat lodge or anything (though I think that would be fun--unless I died of dehydration, which would not be), but I have been contemplating these questions a lot more.

Frankly, I've enjoyed it.

Jewish tradition says that at 40 years of age, people achieve wisdom. I'm not sure I'm there yet (late bloomer?), but I know that often times, the 2nd half can be even more exciting than the first.

Thank you for being part of the game of life with me.

Must Read Book: How to Crush Your Bad Habits

My newest “Must Read” Book is Power of Habit by Charles Duhigg.

It’s been out for a while but I finally got around to reading it recently and all I can say is that I am sorry that it took me this long.

We all have habits. Habits are what make us, in many ways. Some good, some bad.

I’m not telling you anything you don’t know, but what Charles Duhigg tells us ARE things we don’t know. I love books that help you think about how you think and that’s exactly what happens in this one.

Duhigg identifies that each of us possess a “Habit Loop” consisting of

1. a Cue—something that triggers an action
2. a Routine-how we respond to that due
3. a Reward-how we feel as a result

The key to changing habits is to break it down into those three elements and then work to consciously replace one routine with another.

So, if your cue is “I get stressed out at work” and your routine is “I get a cookie or a sugary snack,” so that I get a reward of “I feel better,” and the consequence is weight gain…you need to be able to remove “sugary snack” for “go for a walk.”

The critical element, however, is recognizing the parts of the loop since for many of us, they are intertwined to the point that we don’t see the pieces.

One of the things that I’ve used is the food journal…just keeping track of caloric intake, to help identify cues, routines, and rewards.

We have these habits all over our lives and willpower isn’t enough.

The Power of Habit provides you the background and the roadmap for helping you build/establish the kind of habits you want.

Meet Shoulder Bursitis…

In my never-ending quest to provide high-quality personal medical entertainment, herewith is a recent sonogram of my injured rotator cuff muscle.

For the non-physicians, it’s pretty neat…you get to see bursitis up close and personal.

Unfortunately, I can’t mention when it got injured (hem, hem), but suffice it to say, it hasn’t knocked me out.

3 Coolest Technologies recently...

My friend asked me the other day “what are the 3 coolest technologies you’ve seen recently?”

Number 1, far and away for me, is Google Wallet. More on that here. Mostly because it’s cool and ridiculously useful.

Number 2, for mega-coolness, is Aurasma. It allows you to connect digital content to physical items to create an augmented reality. I learned about it via this TED talk.

Number 3, Wunderlist.
If you are a list person, you’ll love this. It’s like Evernote or Dropbox for lists. You can make a to-do list by category (home, work, shopping, etc.) and then have it sync across devices (Android, iOS, web, etc.). You can even share lists with others. So, for example, I now have created lists for my kids which I share to the iPad that they use. It says “practice piano” and “do homework.”  Now, I don’t have to ask them if they did it. When they finish it, the check it off on the iPad/Wunderlist and it syncs to mine. I get a notification (if I want it) so I know they did it. You can set up recurring tasks (clean room every Sunday morning, for example) as well. Oh yeah, free.

On the mobile payment front, I did try out Square Wallet the other day at Starbucks. It was easy, but not as good as G Wallet. On Square, you have one credit card. On Google, you can pick any number of them. Also, you get a receipt, which you can forward (good for expense reporting).

Are you a fox, hedgehog, or turkey? On Resilience.

I value people and situations that help me think about how I think.

One of my all-time favorite people (and perhaps the smartest guy I know period) is Venkatesh Rao.

He gave an informative talk at LIFT this year which is 18 minutes long, worth it, and will help you think about how you approach the world.

It’s all about Resilience. I call it “leave it all on the field,” but same idea.

Enjoy.