Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Marriage in an age of Distraction…

With 7 different devices, 3 kids, and my own business, my mind is constantly racing.

Sometimes that’s a good thing.

Sometimes it’s not.

The NFO handed me the book Married to Distraction: Restoring Intimacy and Strengthening Your Marriage in an Age of Interruption not because she was saying “we have a problem” (thankfully!) but in her ever-wise way, she’s saying “you should look at this lest we run into a problem.”

Call it the old “ounce of prevention, pound of cure.”

And I’m glad she did.

I saw a LOT of myself in the habits which the authors described and I saw how it could be potentially very destructive to the relationship which I cherish most…the one I have with my smartphone, uh, I mean my wife ;-)

Seriously, the era in which we find ourselves living now, the constant bombardment of information and its 24/7 availability is a good thing, but it can have some serious, deleterious effects.

What I really loved about this book is how they provide a framework for living within this environment. They don’t say “shut it all down,” they say, “it’s here, not here is how we are going to deal with it.”

My favorite concept in the book was the idea of “Conation” which means “how you naturally and instinctively try to do something before anyone has told you waht to do or how to do it.”

Understanding this about your spouse is a key first step to empathy and intimacy.

If you are married or know married people, it’s worth a read.


blog comments powered by Disqus
View Comments