A few more thoughts on the sleep lab experience…

Wanted to get these last two down before I forgot

The room was really nice. More like a hotel than a hospital room. Cozy bed. Quilted. Carpeted.

And the quote of the night from Lucy (the nurse) when I was having a hard time sleeping was:

“It’s ok, some people don’t sleep well outside of their own bed,” because I was thinking “I sleep in a hotel bed pretty much every week.”

Sleep Study— Being Watched in Bed

Disclaimer: if “TMI” is something you normally say, then skip this post. I don’t need that comment

Last week’s SnoreGate kicked it off.

Then, over the weekend, I felt some sensitivity in my lower teeth.

Now, I am plagued with periodontal challenges, since this, unfortunately, is nothing new.

As luck would have it, however, I was scheduled for a cleaning at my periodontist who asked me if I had any concerns. I shared them.

“You know, it’s interesting you say that because I was looking at your chart and I am getting a bit worried about the recession on the inside of your front lower teeth. It could be caused by sleep apnea, your tongue pushing forward as a reaction.”

I shared the snoring incident and he said, “you should probably had a sleep study done. Call your insurance company.”

In a once-in-a-thousand years scenario, I got word from CareFirst that I had met the deductible for the year on our Health Savings Account so the study would be covered (who says we need Obamacare?)

Then, as luck would further have it, the hospital 2.7 miles from my house has a sleep center…and they had an opening the following night. The stars were aligned and I scheduled it.

Arrive at 8.30pm

I showed up on time, ready to go. At first, I thought, “for someone who goes to bed at 1.30am often, how am I going to go to sleep that early?” but I did feel tired and sleepy.

It took about an hour to hook up all the wires. Then, got in bed, watched a bit of TV (Kentucky vs. Michigan State), and then read a new book called “Grounded” (written by my cousin) until at 10.30pm, Lucy came in and said, “Ok, time to go to bed.”

I felt like my kids

It was NOT easy or comfortable to sleep (or try to sleep) with wires all over my head, two straps around my chest, and more wires connected to my chest and legs.

There was no clock so I can’t really say for sure, but I think it took about 45 minutes to fall asleep. Maybe the pressure to perform got to me.

I also kept wondering what they were seeing as they were monitoring brain waves as I was having all of these thoughts. Could they read my mind like “the Matrix?” Were different areas of my mind lighting up and they would see “man, that guy needs to think less about work/money/sex/whatever?”

It was like I was trying to read the minds of the people who were reading my mind.

At some point, maybe 2 hours later, my eyes popped open and moments later, Lucy came in (they can monitory my eye movements) and made some adjustments.

I told her I had to go to the bathroom.

Now, I drink a TON of water and eat a lot of fruit. I had also gone for a run at 4pm the previous afternoon and had rehydrated.

Even though she said, “don’t be embarrassed if you need to go to the washroom” and I knew she was a nurse, and I tend not to be embarrassed by these things, I couldn’t help feeling that way, probably because each time I had to, she would have to unhook me. Not looking forward to being in a nursing home.

I came back to the room and, well, nothing. I could NOT fall asleep. I was tired but my mind was racing about all things…being in a sleep study, work, home, life, upcoming travel plans. I kept having the urge to get up and either check my phone or start working, but I couldn’t.

My mouth was dry and I was a bit hot. I only had a bit of water left in my water bottle. I was also pretty hungry.

Then, maybe 90 minutes later (?), I had to go to the bathroom…again. Nerves? I don’t know. I hesitated, since I was tired and I didn’t want to have to ask again, but eventually, I decided it just had to be done.

They had a microphone in the room so I could just talk and they’d hear me (in addition to the night vision camera where they could watch me), so I just said “Lucy, I need to go to the bathroom.”

And like magic, there she was at the door, unhooking me. I asked her the time. She said, “I can’t tell you that.”

The CIA could learn from these guys Very disorienting.

Just kidding, they were nothing but professional.

Honestly, I may have gone to the bathroom a 3rd time…I’m really not sure at this point (I just got home and am blogging this while it’s still fresh and before the kids get up for school) because there were at least a few occasions when Lucy came in to adjust a wire that I had dislodged. It’s like sleeping in a stocking cap…made of metal.

I eventually did fall back asleep, but before I knew it, Lucy was back, telling me it was time to get up. At this point, she told me it as 5.20am and her one question: “Do you usually sleep this little?”

I’m kind of like a camel. I don’t sleep that much during the week, but Friday nights, I’ll go to bed at 8:30pm and sleep until 6:30am.

Anyway, results will come in about a week, I’m told.

The goop in your hair to keep the pads sticky is, well, sticky, and taking those pads off of a hairy chest…very uncomfortable.

Ok, time to go wake the kids and drink some coffee

Thanks for the support.

Another reason why it’s not easy being married to me…

 

If you had to listen to this at night…

Having A Great Partner-Lessons from the Race of My Life

On Sunday, I ran in the Army Ten Miler.

It was the best run of my life.

Back in April, I ran the Cherry Blossom 10 miler and I averaged 8:24 per mile. I was ecstatic then.

Since then, I had improved not only my training, but my diet as well. Was feeling stronger.

Except for the fact that I slept horribly on the night before, the stars were aligned. Beautiful morning. Got to the race in time to prep the body, as it were (runners know what I mean).

After I crossed the starting line, about 1/4 mile of the way in, I saw a guy next to me glance at his watch. I asked him our pace. “7:55,” he replied.

“What’s your target?”

“Right around there.”

So, I replied. “Well, I’ll stay with you as long as I can,” figuring he could pace me and even if I couldn’t keep up, at least I would have a strong start.

He said, “Sure, it’s always easier running with a partner.”

And, it was.

Not only did I get a chance to learn a bit about Nick Poulos’ life and perspective, but I had someone who looked after me-and vice versa-providing the little encouragement needed when-at various moments-your energy wanes.

Uphills, certain mileage points, and then the drive to the finish.

With Nick’s help, I was able to run the race of my life.

And it made me realize the importance of partnership in life across the board. Whether in marriage, business, or friends.

The Great Depression and Why I Love Being a Dad

The other day, Paco said to me “What was the Great Depression?”

Not only did I love his curiosity, but I loved this focus on the answer.

And, we went through a lot…starting with WW1, Hoover and going through the New Deal.

We covered some Macroeconomic theory in there as well.

But, it wasn’t so much the information as it was the process.

I just found myself enjoying the opportunity to share and engage with him (and the girls, who were avidly listening as well).

A moment to savor.

Truer Words Were Never Spoken

Never Had a DUI…

but my gut says they aren’t like this.

HT: Barak Epstein for sending it over.

The "Ask Mom" App

Paco was looking for his shin guards before soccer.

I asked him to be a bit more focused.

He said, “I have a better idea. I am going to use the app on my phone.”

He’s 8…doesn’t have a smartphone.

But, I turned around and saw him dialing on the home phone. He smiled.

“It’s called the ‘ask Mom app’”

Sure enough, it located the shin guards for him.

Babysitter cancellation policy?

If you make a reservation for a babysitter…and then you need to cancel, what would you say is the timeframe in which you should pay him/her for the time that was set aside?

When it all goes right…

Most of us are acutely aware of days when it all seems to go wrong.

But, every now and then, we hit a day when it all seems to go right.

Yesterday, for me, was one of those days. I’m just documenting it to practice gratitude.

It started at 5.30am in Dallas.

Took the cab to the airport, no problem. Was first in line at security.

I needed a smoothie—it was right across from my gate, which was directly across from security.

The flight got in early. The whole plane was full…except for the window seat next to me (I had an aisle seat).

I had arranged a phone call with the caveat that I would be late if something went awry on my flight. I called Tim exactly at noon.

I had lunch plans in Tysons Corner. There was no traffic and I was there, from the airport in 14 minutes, early for lunch.

The weather was gorgeous, there was a first-rate salad bar, and we ate outside.

Made it home with no traffic.

Took a run and had my best run of the year.

When I got back, the kids were there and we had a blast for 3 hours (I had been away for 2 days).

Read a book with Nadia. Watched baseball with Paco. Had a fun talk with Tikkanen.

After they went to bed, I got to Inbox Zero.

Had a chance to catch up on one of my favorite shows, Sons of Anarchy.

Wanted another smoothie…the NFO had gotten wheatgrass which I wanted to try out.

Had a good talk with the NFO.

Got a haircut.

The shirt I wanted to wear the next day was clean (thanks again to NFO).

Well, you get the idea.

#CountingBlessings

Wedding Gifts as Memory Creators

I will admit, I don’t usually put much thought into wedding gifts. My philosophy is “either buy from the registry or give cash.”

That’s what people usually really need when they are starting out.

But, the other day, my friend and former running partner, Robyn, sent me a note to challenge this belief.

“I keep thinking of you and NFO, because you gave us some lovely trays as a wedding gift, "to serve each other." 

We use them all the time and, lately, our younger daughter has taken to using them to surprise someone in the family with breakfast in bed.  With reciprocation, this has generated quite a few different breakfasts in bed for different members of the family, all on the trays that you gave to us. 

It is nice to see Hilary's delight at giving the simple gift of a cup of coffee and a bowl of Cheerios on a tray, or receiving breakfast on a tray herself.  Anyways, this new "tradition" that Hilary has started for our family struck me as very much in the spirit of the gift that you gave to us, so I thought that you might like to hear about it.”

Now, it’s possible that these were on Robyn’s wedding registry, but obviously the note that accompanied it (undoubtedly written by the NFO) lodged itself in Robyn’s mind…and though we haven’t seen each other in a LONG time, still serves as a bond.

Maybe towels aren’t the way to go?

What is your wedding gift philosophy?

This Commercial Made Me Cry….

and that’s why I am telling you about the video.

What I love about it is that they realized, “we’re not in the gum business, we’re in the storytelling business.”

If you get people to connect emotionally with your brand, no matter what you sell, it’s going to help.

My Son in the Future

I have a pretty good relationship with Paco.

He’s a sweet boy. Charming. A wonderful smile. Mischievous to the point of being cute.

A great athlete. A great sports companion. He’s 8. His innocence is eternal and refreshing.

I do my best to cherish it.

For example, you know what he wants from me on his birthday?

A 1:1 drive along the length of an entire avenue named for one of the states.

Last year, we did all of Connecticut Avenue. This year, all of Massachusetts Ave.

We saw it change from urban to suburban. From commercial to Embassy Row to residential.

I took a “mental snapshot” and savored it.

In fact, he did me proud as we drove home and were instructed by the NFO to pick up one item at the store.

She told us it was at Shopper’s which wasn’t quite on the path. The Safeway was, but she didn’t know if the item was there.

I said to Paco, “ok, buddy, we have a choice. We can go to Safeway and take a chance. If it’s there, we save time and get home sooner. If not, we lose time and have to go to Shopper’s.”

You know what he said?

“Go Big or Go Home!”

So we went to Safeway…it wasn’t there, but we didn’t care.

I thought of all of this tonight as I read an article I saw on Facebook about a dad trying to relate to his teenage son.

It gave me a “flashforward” to a day in the future when my boy may not want to talk or play with me. When I’ll be an irritation to him.

I know it is part of the rite of passage. Of separation. Of preparing for life without me.

What’s the word for pre-emptive nostalgia?

Another Business Disruption

If it’s happening to cab drivers, it can happen to anyone.

Customers-in aggregate-now have more power than the businesses.

The Backstory

At BWI rail station, cabs wait to pounce on stranded or time-constrained passengers, charging exorbitant fees to take advantage of a stressful situations.

It’s cause for resentment, but what can you do?

Disruption Awakening

While waiting to pick up a colleague, I started to chat with some of the cabbies and the talk turned to their business practices, how they decided what to charge whom.

“You know that you guys have a pretty bad reputation, right?”

They looked surprised.

I pulled out my phone and showed them my recent Foursquare check-in, where the tips frequently discussed how to deal with the predatory cab practices.

They were floored. “What’s the name of this app? I need to download it.”

It Is Happening to Everyone

EVERY organization and every industry deals with people. Those people have a voice that can be heard everywhere and at zero marginal cost.

NOT hearing the voice and engaging in a conversation with it leads down a lonely path.

Note: Sprinklr integrates with Foursquare so large companies can see who is checking-in and connect that information with the same person’s behavior on other social networks. In that way, they know if someone checks in at a store, it is the same person who tweeted last week about loving sweaters (or whatever it might be. You get the picture.)

A Meeting That Took 5 Years…Brought to you by Social Networking

Every now and then, with all of the excitement that surrounds the potential for social media in business, politics, etc., you forget what makes it so amazingly powerful.

Creating and solidifying connections between people.

It’s so simple. And it’s at the core of al the potential, but it gets lost in terms like “reach” and “engagement.”

The other day, however, I had a moment that brought me back, reminding me of the inherent beauty of the democratization of communication.

Five years ago, my friend Tom Harshbarger said, “there’s a guy you need to meet. His name is Brent Leary.”

Since then, Brent and I connected in many ways…email, phone, text, blogs, Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, podcast interviews, Google+, Foursquare…you get the picture.

But, we had never actually met in person.

Until August 27th, 2013.

I gave Brent the heads up that I would be in Atlanta and he joined me for the event. Here is the video commemorating the moment and serving as the reminder of why he and I are so passionate about not just the technologies, but the possibilities they offer.

Listening to Youth: Letter to your Future Self

When you’re in your 20s, you tend to think you know everything. The challenge is that you don’t know when you don’t know something. As a result, you don’t shut up when you should and let people with more experience do it.

When you’re in your 40s, you’ve realized that you knew something in your 20s, but may have been naïve about other things. At the same time, you realize there are people in their 60s and 70s who know a hell of a lot more. The challenge is figuring out which is which.

And, I’m guessing, the challenge when you get into your 50s and 60s is that sometimes you overweight experience.

I have been wanting to write a letter to my future self to remind me that, once upon a time, I was in my 20s. I had a pretty good understanding of technology, the Internet, and what would be its impact on the world (although, I didn’t see all of it, of course). Where I was really naïve was in how to commercialize it, how long it would take, among other things, but I was on the right track.

So, I want my future self to know that, one day, I am going to meet a 20 year old who will be full of energy, talking about how the world will change and that, while he or she may be off on a few key things, s/he will be spot on about others.

I just hope I am wise enough to pay attention.

What’s wrong with this list?

I download the list of school supplies for my 3rd and 4th graders today and it made me sad. Here’s the list. Try to guess why.

Then, read at the bottom for my thoughts. Feel free to comment and tell me why I am wrong.

So, here’s why.

With the exception of a small number of items, it’s pretty much the same list I got when I was in 3rd grade.

Given the amount of innovation that has happened since then, I just find it really hard to believe that the tools necessary to get educated are the same.

It makes me very worried about whether my kids are getting as prepared as possible. With technology and globalization the competition is more intense and the need for great education is even higher.

Particularly acute given how much I am spending (granted that some of this cost is devoted to religious/cultural education, so I accept that).

Then, I saw my friend Mike’s status and I was envious:

In an email from my rising 6th grader's teacher: "Students will need daily internet access and a computer in order to complete their homework assignments." Oh, have times changed!

The Dead Presidents—Ohio Day 3

I had one of those “oh wait, I think so-and-so lives here” as we drove through suburban Cleveland.


I saw the Cleveland Clinic and remembered that a friend from college-whom I had not seen in 18 years-Sandhia Varyani, lived near by. So, I called her and got to see her-and introduce her to the kids. A nice side benefit.

As much fun as that was, it wasn’t our primary goal when we stayed in Solon, OH (named after a Greek leader? I should look).

The reason we selected it was because of its proximity to Mentor, OH, the home of America’s 20th President, James A. Garfield.

The Park Ranger was first rate and very kid-friendly in the hour long tour of the home. Garfield, who only made it to Day 200 of his Presidency before he was assassinated by a guy with delusions of grandeur, was extremely well read. His library had over 5,000 books and he could speak French and German as well as reading Latin and Greek.

The Junior Park Ranger program gave the kids some great activities as they went through the house and they also got a sense of what life was like in the 1880’s. The “deep dive” was just what we had in mind when we visited.
2.5 hours later, after a drive across central Ohio, we found ourselves in Marion, home of the 29th President, Warren G. Harding.  While the house was closed (we still counted it as a visit), we did get to sit on his porch and read some facts about him from Wikipedia (where else?)

Harding was known for many scandals during his administration and has consistently ranked near the bottom of US Presidents. However, it seems like some folks are now looking at his stance on the 8-hour work day, women’s issues, and Civil Rights to try and portray him in a different light.

Like Garfield and McKinley, he didn’t make it out of office…though he wasn’t assassinated.
We stopped at a great park on a beautiful day. It felt like Heartland America in small town America. Very quaint.

After sufficient energy was burned off, we drove to Columbus where we had some Graeter’s ice cream (I had to go with Buckeye flavor) and then spent some quality time with my cousins, Lee and Shelby Nathans.

Our Holiday Inn Express had a mini water park (slides and fountains, etc.), so we had a chance to catch up over pizza while the kids seriously frolicked. The NFO is on point during our trips for securing lodging and she rocks it when it comes to finding a place with a pool and a fridge…so we got to swim every night. (I also helped the kids understand why I like hot tubs).

The next morning-and our final official activity on the trip-took us to COSI-Columbus Museum of Science and Industry-which is definitely one of the best museums of its kind that I’ve seen.  The exhibits were fantastic and the bonus was that we had a chance to spend some time with the NFO’s cousin, Bruria Martin and her kids, who are living in Columbus for 2 years (from Israel). Outside, the kids had the opportunity to sit in some tractors, which they loved.

The kids are at a good age now. A degree of self-sufficiency that makes movement easier. They can cooperate and assist and with the iPads, they are generally placid for the ride.
All of this makes the ultimate objective-instilling curiosity and a passion for discovery-easier to accomplish.
The theme of “visiting the homes of Presidents” makes it easy for us to get motivated and have a core focus.
Whatever it is…I would call this trip a success.

Halls of Fame and Presidents—A Summer Road Trip to Ohio

A few years ago, after a visit to Jefferson’s home at Monticello and Madison’s at Montpelier, the kids developed an appreciation for history and excitement for the Presidents.

Somehow, we came up with the idea that a worthwhile goal would be to visit the home (or some place) associated with each President (and, no, the White House doesn’t count.)

So, when we were thinking about summer vacations, we were using this as a criteria and we discovered that Ohio has connection to 8 Presidents (albeit, some looser than others).

Still, it seemed like a good idea and when we combined our love of football (a visit to the Pro Football Hall of Fame) and Music (the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame), it seemed like a manageable trip.

Day 1 took us from DC to Canton and with summer hours going to 8, we were able to explore the Football HOF with plenty of time to spare. The kids-all of them-loved the history and the interactive exhibits. Even the NFO got into the swing of things.  Any time you have tablet computers and videos, you’re going to do well…which is exactly what happened.

I stopped to pay homage to Joe Gibbs and explain some of the great moments of the game. I am proud to say that it seems to have worked.

Once we were in Canton, OH, it was a very short hop to the William McKinley Memorial and Library. The 25th President was assassinated in 1901 and it’s interesting to think what would have happened if that hadn’t happened…his VP was Teddy Roosevelt.

The Memorial is built on a hill with a significant number of steps leading up to it. Entombed with him are his wife and 2 daughters who, sadly, died when before reaching age 4. It included an impressive biography of his life as well. Adjacent to the Memorial is the Presidential Center which had a mock “street” demonstrating what life looked like in the early 1900s…printing press, saloon, and all.

There was a also a great Science Center which the kids loved.

Afterwards, we headed to the First Ladies’ Historical Site, situated in the family home of Ida McKinley. Alas, it was closed on Monday, but we did get a chance to visit the gift shop, so all was not lost.

Moving at rapid pace, we then visited the Harry London chocolate factory, part of the Fannie Mae family (and now owned by 800Flowers.com) where we not only got to sample some great chocolate (of course), we had the chance to see it being made.  The kids LOVED this in all facets.

They’ve been great travelers, minimal complaints, and enjoying most visits. Of course, family trips with iPads and GPS aren’t what they used to be.

Since the point of this trip (and really all travel) is to widen horizons and instill curiosity, we figured a trip to the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame in Cleveland would fit the bill (and, let’s be honest, I wanted to go there).

While the kids only really knew The Beatles and Elvis Presley (they were surprised that Carly Rae Jepsen and Beyonce weren’t in the HOF yet), they still had a great time. Even Paco (the erstwhile sports fan) said he had more fun at the R&R than at the Football HOF. Go figure.

The most fun part, if you ask me, of any visit is asking the kids what their favorite part was and hearing the unexpected answers, but walking through the big mouth/tongue to the Rolling Stones exhibit did make the cut.

We did have to navigate the museum with some care as (to be expected) there were a few exhibits/comments that weren’t, shall we say, family friendly…

I don’t think the guys picked up on it and we were no worse for the wear. At least now they know who the Rolling Stones are and I think they also know names like The Kinks, Supremes, Stevie Wonder, the Who, the Doors, and ZZ Top, so I would consider it successful.

Tomorrow is our next big Presidential day when we try to get James Garfield in Mentor, OH (interestingly enough, he was also assassinated) and Warren Harding in Merion.

Resilience

Beginning way back in 1998 when I read the book “Adversity Quotient,” I’ve settled on the idea that one of the key determinants for success (beyond talent and skills, etc.) is RESILIENCE.

The ability to dig deep, leave it all on the field, never give up, push on in the face of tremendous odds.

For me, the Tough Mudder was just a practice run for that in real life.

The latest book to drive that home came to me courtesy of my wonderful (seriously) mother-in-law.

It is called The Unthinkable: Who Survives When Disaster Strikes - and Whyand provides anecdotes and evidence about why, ultimately, it’s resilience that matters when a disaster (9/11, Katrina, etc.) occurs.

Do you believe you will make it?

Have you thought about it in the past and previously practiced/convinced yourself that you will make it?

These are critical factors and traits I hope to instill in my kids. That’s why I was super proud when I saw Paco’s basketball camp report card…and the praise he got for pushing as hard as he did.

Shooting, dribbling, etc. All of that comes…but grit. That has to be cultivated.

And it seems like there is a good reason why.