Continuing on with the explanation of the multiple hats I try to wear...mainly to just amuse and entertain myself.
Given the history of the Epstein family and how we were cheated out of some money by one Count von Eppstein, I figured that the least I can do to restore the family honor is not just take the family name, but the title as well.
Hence, in Germany (and by extension the rest of Europe), I go by "Count."
And, in my neighborhood when parents ask me what their kids should call me, (e.g. "Jeremy" or "Mr. Epstein"), I tell them "neither. Have them call me 'Count'."
One funny story (at least I think it is funny) occurred a few years ago when I was head of the technology committee for the synagogue.
I got a call about a technical issue and discovered that the financial database had been corrupted. So, I went in to repair it.
Once I had, I needed to verify that all the data was working properly. I didn't think it was appropriate for me to look at other people's financial records, but I figured I could look at my own.
So, I went into my account and changed our titles from Mr. and Mrs. Epstein to Count and Countess von Epstein.
For 3 years, all of the mailings from the synagogue to our home were addressed to 'Count and Countess von Epstein."