Memorial Day

I do feel a little bad about how unsolemn Memorial Day is for most Americans.

Someone sent me this image and I thought it was really appropriate.

There are plenty of crazy things going on in America now, but Americans should never lose sight of how grateful they are to live in this country.

Though the day wasn't solemn, I did make it count. Spent some time with Nadia on the softball field working on her mechanics. 

It was a nice father-daughter moment on a day made possible by the sacrifices of others.

Things your kids say...

Sometimes you just have to capture them...

Nadia (age 7.5) has been stricken with a stomach bug the last 24 hours or so.

One of the things that is unique about her when she is sick is how relaxed she is. There are occasions, when she isn't sick, that she can be excessively demanding. However, when sick, she is very concerned with how much work she is making us to (cleaning up, etc.)  It's kind of unusual (at least compared to the other kids).

She's also very calm and reflective.

Tonight, while talking with her, she said the following:

When I noticed that her two front teeth were loose and asked if I could pull them out, she said:
"No offense, but I will ask Dod (Uncle) Akiva."
"Why?" I said. "I'm gentle and sensitive."
"Actually, you're the total opposite. You're, what's the word? You're too aggressive."


She was upset that she didn't have her favorite blanket to sleep with (it was being washed). I asked her about her Tinkerbell/Disney one.

"I don't like Tinkerbell or fairies anymore. I want something that isn't too girlish or too boyish. Maybe with peace signs or something."
"How about a Sprinklr blanket?" I asked.
"No. I'm Sprinklr supportive, but not that Sprinklr supportive."

Welcoming the newest Epstein..

We probably closed in on 250 people today at the Simchat Bat for Nitzahn and we loved every minute of it.

The NFO had a vision...make the event about serving other people.

So, we had 4 activity tables (as kid-friendly as possible) to accomplish that. And each table was devoted to the memory of one of our grandparents

1. a table for making flower blankets that will be donated to A Wider Circle's Well Mother program
2. a table for Sunnygrams for Project Sunshine
3. a table for Craft Kits for Project Sunshine
4. a table for cards for the bombarded children of Sderot, Israel

We also asked our guests to answer the following question for Nitzahn (if you didn't do it already, offer up via a comment here):

What valuable skill do you think you can teach Nitzahn?

And we've gotten some great responses so far.

I'll post some pictures later, but for now here are some from Edith Gelfand.

I was particularly pumped to hear about the connections made via the use of name tags.

Josh Pines met Esther Kustanowitz in person (previously only known online). Mike Fox and Mark Spira met in person for the first time even though they are both in the same fantasy football league. And Tevi Troy reconnected with Alan Gersch, his high school and college classmate after 18 years!

It's the people you meet at an event that make the experience, so we were excited to see that happen.

And a few key lessons on big events

1. As the host, you should expect to have no more than 2 minute conversations with each guest.
2. You can have up to 2 two minute conversations
3. As a guest, you shouldn't expect more from your host. Don't try to monopolize. I can't stand the high maintenance guests. Sorry, have to be honest here.
4. When bringing a gift, staple or tape securely the card to the gift. The worst feeling in the world is when the host can't match up the right gift/card combo.

Three Kids...First Thoughts

I know it's early, something like 1% of the precincts have reported, but so far, I'm willing to go along with the wisdom I've received that:

"the transition from 1 to 2 kids is more difficult than 2 to 3."

0 to 1 is, of course, a paradigm shift of epic proportions, so that's a different category.

But, especially with the whole bedrest experience, I feel pretty confident and at ease in my ability to manage the other 2 (playing zone) while the NFO takes on Nitzahn (man to man) [btw, a lot of folks have asked-no nickname yet...you can't rush the evolutionary process]

Besides, it's proportionally not that big a deal. Going from 1 to 2 is a 100% increase. 2 to 3 is only a 50% increase in the number of kids!

There was a moment over the weekend when the NFO was napping and I found myself in the den with all three kids at once. Caught myself thinking...whoa, I have a brood here.

That was a bit crazy, indeed.

I understand why non-first children feel a bit neglected sometimes (the NFO is #4) b/c you just don't have as much time.

On that topic, I am a bit concerned...how do you allocate time, my most valuable asset, to the kids in the right proportion?

I feel like Paco has been given a bit of extra time lately...my gut tells me that he needs it a bit more, so I've focused on it. But, I don't want Tonka to be left out of the mix and tonight, I apologized to her for not having as much 1:1 time as I would have liked today.

They had a solid day and we had fun (and a big assist to my brother, Barak, and two rock star sisters who came in for some middle inning relief work), but knowing when to give time to each, all, or none [need to have time to blog, of course] is something I'm going to have to learn.

Regardless, it's pretty cool...my ego tells me that I'm a mild patriarch now.

What's interesting is the absolute blurring between work and life, particularly in the digital age.

I've got a desktop pc and 2 laptops, deployed strategically around the house. Plus a smartphone. I move seamlessly from one to the other as I alternate between work and home responsibilities. Send an email, go change a diaper, pick up some toys, and then analyze a spreadsheet.

The digital revolution empowers me to be at home and do more than I would if I were at an office, but knowing what is "work time" or not is more and more becoming a thing of the past.

The NFO has been great about not asking me to get up too much in the middle of the night (she asks for 1 time so she doesn't have to get out of bed to change diapers) and I've becoming a devotee of the "whenver I can get it" nap, so all in all, I'm not too exhausted....yet.

Honestly, a bigger challenge recently has been that Paco (who usually naps for 2-3 hours in the PM) hasn't been going to bed [and has been getting out of bed multiple times a night] until 10pm.

So, yesterday, even though he threw a tantrum, I wouldn't let him nap at all...made him take a bath when he was tired, just so he would stay awake. I worked, but it was a 1 hour long tantrum. Need to figure out a way to get him 'over the hump' so he catches his 2nd wind without the kicking, screaming, and crying of "I want to take a nap!!!"

Bottom line, Nitzahn is a beautiful kid. Her siblings and mother adore her (as do I) and we're adjusting...one day at at a time. As I've often quoted my mom:

"The days are long, but the years are short."